Mr Crociere

1 May 2011. Filed under category Nomad.
Mr Crociere must remain anonymous

Mr Crociere must remain anonymous

On my Mediterranean cruise, I noticed a particularly handsome young man who worked on the ship. I cannot name him or say what he worked with as I might get him into trouble with his employer, MSC Crociere. As such, I will simply call him Mr Crociere in this post.

At first, I couldn’t tell why I was drawn to this young man. There was something more than just good looks. I made a couple of flirtatious remarks and was pleasantly surprised when he responded in kind. Before long, we organized secret midnight rendezvous on a quiet part of deck seven, at a blind spot in between two security cameras. It was there, overlooking the roaring black sea and struggling to overcome our language barrier (His English and my Spanish were equally poor.), that I understood why I had been drawn to Mr Crociere. He was a kindred nomad at heart.

You might have preconceived notions of what two gay men get up to during a midnight rendezvous, and to be honest, so did I. However, Mr Crociere had other plans. He wanted to speak about his nomadic life and the reasons why he chose it. The words tumbled out of him with both relief and joy, as if he had been carrying them within for a long time, searching for someone who would understand him.

Mr Crociere began by telling me that he was not religious. Because of this, he explained, there is no heaven waiting for him when he dies. This life is all he will ever get. He must live it now or die knowing that he wasted his only chance. How then could he live a simple life where he meets a partner and settles down with a stable job and a stable home? He would then have experienced but a thin sliver of life’s full potential. He felt, passionately, that he needed to see more, do more, feel more, be more.

This urgency to explore life did not stop with just travel. He similarly could not see himself making life-long commitments to a single job or a single partner either. To many, those are uncomfortable words because they challenge the norm of what is a good life. It takes a lot of strength to break such norms, and at the young age of twenty-four, Mr Crociere had both the clarity of mind and bravery to formulate and reach for what he truly wants. How could I not be attracted to such a person?

When I first met Mr Crociere, I was looking to spend a couple of hours with a handsome man, and I expected little more. Instead, I found a deeply interesting soul who revealed aspects of my own nomadic urges. Like him, I feel the same urgency to live life fully. Like him, I can’t afford the luxury of treating my life as a footnote to an eternal afterlife. This is it. Make the most of it. That is how Mr Crociere and I live.

Making every day count is not easy; it is stressful and full of self-imposed expectations, but it is also a life of passion and risk taking, adventure and travel. Curse or blessing, the likes of Mr Crociere has no choice. This is who we are.

I am not saying that only atheists appreciate life. I know many atheists who piss their lives away, and I know many religious people who don’t let the eternal ever-after distract them from their here-and-now. What I am saying is that I had not made the connection between my own disbelief in an afterlife and my hunger for adventures.

What about you? Does your inescapable mortality affect how you approach life, and is it affected by your belief in what comes after it is over?

Finally, if you read this, Mr Crociere, then I want you to know that meeting you helped me understand some of my own motives in life. I wish you the very best on your journey. Thank you for those midnight rendezvous and I hope that our roads will cross again sometime.

How do your beliefs in what lies beyond the light affect how you live your life?

How do your beliefs in what lies beyond the light affect how you live your life?

A message to MI5

The post picture is of the Guy Fawkes mask worn by the character V in the comic book and film V for Vendetta, one of my favourite films. I am only using it to reflect the forced anonymity of Mr Crociere. He is in no way looking to blow up the Houses of Parliament, at least not as far as I know.

To avoid any future confusion, I want to state very clearly that if the Houses of Parliament is one day blown up then I had nothing to do with it and the use of the picture in question is pure coincidence.

And please don’t waterboard me to find the identity of Mr Crociere. He most likely had nothing to do with it either, and I don’t want to get him fired.

The Portrait Category

Travel is discovery, not just of places but people too. This is the first post in the Portrait category where I will write about the people I meet on my journey.


Does your faith or lack thereof affect your adventurous spirit?

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  1. Craig Brown says:

    I think no one knows, not the most ardent atheist to the firmest believer, what really happens after we die. Our brains are constrained to being able to picture a world within just a few orders of magnitude, the space/time scale we live on. If there is no afterlife, your friend will have lived the fullest life for him. If there is an afterlife, he will also be prepared for the new experience just like he did in life. How does this question effect the person not drawn to wandering, who authentically wants a family for example? I don’t like birthdays especially. Everyday is my birthday. Everyday is the right occasion to bring out the fancy plates!

  2. daz73 says:

    For my sanity, I deliberately derailed my existing work life in December to rid myself of a track I didn’t want to be carried along on anymore.
    I am only here now- I don’t have the time to waste it being someone and somewhere I don’t want to be……
    Five months on and now my money’s running out and I’m still unemployed and my path is still unclear, people have expected me to regret my decision because of the fear and insecurity it’s put my way. And even I’ve wondered, and more recently, cried over whether I did the right thing because of the responsibilities I have at this point n my life.
    HOWEVER, reading this post right now whilst I’m in the eye of the storm, re connects me to the spirit of change and flow and wandering that you’re being so brave to respond to Gustav, and it reminds me to hold onto it too.


  3. Jono says:

    Yip. What he said.

    “Live a good life. If there are gods & they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones.”

    Marcus Aurelius

  4. Linden says:

    I do not think most people live their life reflecting a whole lot on the afterlife, maybe you’re right, maybe they should but for most people it would be utterly stressful thinking that way. I share your thoughts on making the most of life, I don’t believe in a afterlife, but the definitions of what it means to live life the fullest not wasting time are probably as many as there are people in the world.

    One thing I’m sure of though is that if there is an afterlife or second chanse after death most people would still not make the effort getting up from the sofa in heaven, go over to Ghandi and ask him what the hell went through his mind sleeping every night with two naked women, not doing anything with them just to prove his willpower…

    / written with a hangover 🙂

  5. I don’t think faith and an adventurous spirit are necessarily related. I have more of the latter than the former, but that is changing as I get older and wiser. I aim to live my live exactly as you & Mr. Crociere do…one reason I ditched sunny, superficial SoCal for cool, breezy Amsterdam. Outstanding post and beautiful blog! My thanks to Craig Brown for the referral. Craig met my nomadic son Blake Adams (aka Blizzake) on a plane to Paris…hours after he completed the Chicago Marathon in an impressive 4:40.

Does your faith or lack thereof affect your adventurous spirit?

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